Wednesday, December 24, 2014

Santa Spirit

SANTA
SPIRIT

ARC © 12/8/14
(705 words)

I was five - bursting with excitement - we were in a new home; there was a fireplace - Santa was going to come down our very own fireplace.
I remember being precocious - I had checked it out - there was no opening. I reasoned, Santa must have magic dust and sprinkled it so that it opened up for his big body and all the toys in his very big bag.
Then that day etched in my mind forever when Mom held me closely and said she had to tell me a secret just between her and me. I remember the awe as she leaned in with this information - wow, a secret. She told me I was now a very big girl. I already knew that, of course, for when my younger sister was born, she was put in my arms. I was the `little Mommy’. So, of course, I was a big girl.
Then, the horrifying words…Santa wasn’t real!!! Worse, I had to pretend he was because my sister was too young so we were going to have a secret and not tell her so she could still have Christmas the way I used to have Christmas. My world was crushed. I didn’t want to be a big sister. I didn’t want to be a little mommy. I wanted to be little again; I wanted Santa.
It was the worse Christmas of my life…and I am now a blessed septuagenarian. Of course, as years progressed, I learned all about Yes Virginia, there is a Santa Claus; and, of course, I got it, but the memory of that little five year old being `told the truth’ etched deep enough that I vowed: not the same for mine.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yes,_Virginia,_there_is_a_Santa_Claus
So, I was ready…and oh, so, so easy. From toddler reading, the `spirit’ was taught…how there was a blessed historical Saint Nicholas who delivered goodies and put in children’s shoes left out on doorsteps and how his reputation and story had evolved into the present day Santa Claus where parents, relatives, and friends lovingly bought gifts and wrapped them for children and loved ones. Everyone loved the idea of caring and sharing so the spirit of Christmas has grown and grown with trees and Christmas is a very special feast day of a little baby named Jesus who was born to a mother named Mary and that the name Christmas means Christ’s mass and that also at the same time there is another blessed holiday called Hanukah which means feasts of lights celebrated by Jewish people where presents too are exchanged.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Saint_Nicholas
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Santa_Claus
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hanukkah
If I had known about Kwanzaa at that time, I would have shared that too.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kwanzaa
It was easy then to go about the magic shopping of the holidays reinforcing the joy and beauty of loved ones who cares and share and also pointing out the disappointment of so, so many who do not have families that are able to do so; and that is why it is so important to be grateful and whenever possible try to give and share too.
The special holy/holiday was highlighted when my daughter was four and the repeated story of Saint Nicholas glittered extra in her eyes. She suddenly looked up and with a mischievous look went to all our closests and pulled a pair of shoes from each one…brought them to the front door and put them outside…knowing full well that her delighted parents would certainly find some fun gift to put in them too. It was that same year that my son’s adopted dad stayed up all night to build his very own hockey play game. To his joy and delight it was under the tree and of course he was well aware that Santa Claus dad had worked all night to make it; and even though so tired had to play a game with him that awesome day.
I have often prayed for those little ones who never had anyone to explain to them the spirit; instead cried to themselves with anguish and wonder of why oh why did they not receive the wonderment of gifts and others did. I have never stopped.
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AGE

AGE

ARC

© December 2, 2014, 3:20 AM Tuesday

By eight I was a `mini’ mom/gofer to disabled mother.
Life was joyous with multi siblings and doting father.

Strife known at early age, precocious empathy tuned high.
Reading cultivated kaleidoscope persona catcher in the rye.

Eagerness for in vivo experiences boldly went forth.
Inner soul compass always seeking pure clear north.

Mistakes and sins, off course, part and parcel of progress.
Admitting to myself wrongdoings, mea culpa alleviate stress.

Self-centered ambition ruled salad years.
Result of which culminated most tears.

Motherhood, multi faceted career made decades race.
Like It’s A Wonderful Life, I’ve left a legacy trace.

Life seriously threatened in mid-sixties: almost over.
Revivified life joyously sings White Cliffs of Dover.

Grateful septuagenarian’s prayer to Most High.
May I please you more until the sweet by and by.

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http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gofer
http://www.sparknotes.com/lit/catcher/themes.html

http://www.lyricsfreak.com/v/vera+lynn/the+white+cliffs+of+dover_20340492.html

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/In_the_Sweet_By-and-By
4/1/15
http://news.yahoo.com/worlds-oldest-person-dies-117-japan-035640645.html

DEATH’S VESTIBULE - ARC 12/16/14

DEATH’S
VESTIBULE

ARC © 12/16/14

It was twilight Thursday, December 15, 2005.

Christmas tree had presents wrapped under it:
one was for daughter due to visit Christmas week.
It was pepper spray protection kit.
She soloed for work travel.
I had encouraged her to take self-defense class from woman police officer
as I once did.

It was her birth in 1968 that had prompted me to start ARC,
a nonprofit: spiritual avocation of seeing what I, one person -
strictly by self-labor and Samaritan tax-deductible donations,
could do for God/country without government, grant funding.

As it turned out, quite a lot. Twenty years devoted to children, educational outreach, complimentary seminars/publications, mentoring.

And then, 1990: huge transformation from little ones to big ones:
homeless and recovery.

As my 65th approached felt divine compulsion: put affairs in order:
I listened: assigned equity paid home to nonprofit legacy trust for children, will drawn up, Neptune cremation plan bought. Suddenly opportunity arose to open new shelter back East in birth state. So nonprofit borrowed from children‘s estate‘ - heigh-ho, heigh-ho, off I go with volunteer Kimosabe.

I had done thorough research: need was great.
Networking comprehensive by phone, letter, email…brochure explicit: referrals please - first week free…no violent history nor moral turpitude…
I was alone/no vehicle.

In operation November; early December friend returned to visit, driving me to visit connections. Two men in the home; then anxious call came for third: white male, 23, Catholic roots. His grandfather and social worker escorted him. I `felt something’ - dismissed it.

Three days later, Dec. 16th, he, the other two and friend in back yard burning trash. I’m in bedroom, off the kitchen, reading. I hear noise.

I went to kitchen, saw him behind the counter with head down…
he looked up…instant shock…ice coursing through me…Manson serpent eyes sucking my breath. He slithered towards me with knife shanks in both hands. The whispered howling scream was knowingly unheard; arms up as the knives slashed to the hiss of his mocking taunting voice. I am backing up - surreal slow motion - traumatized fear consuming every sinew of my being. Suddenly, cell phone blastopores in mind; I turn, am close, grab, touch, trip, fall…like a little girl hiding under bed from horrible bogyman, shut my eyes…felt knife pierce right eye unleashing fiercest pain ever experienced accompanied to unbelievable surprise thought that revivifies daily over and over like a stuck loop…I’m going to die; I’m going to die!

In coma two months…multi spiritual experiences…learned attacker had followed one of the others into upstairs bedroom; pounced with knives.

He got away calling for my friend who rushed and rescued me. Convinced emergency room doctors when they said I couldn’t be saved to go back in: he promised God 20 years of his life to give to me. And then when they came again and uttered they had to take my arms, he responded they couldn’t: I was a writer and Sicilian - talked and wrote with them.

When he and children were told recovery very tenuous,
they best line up convalescent home. They replied - you don’t know her.

The attacker got 15 years (maximum allotted) for two counts of attempted murder. Social worker knew he was violent; had attacked father and grandfather the day before they brought him to home.

When asked why, her? he responded: my father is Satan, you know.

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